M. Aline

You ever come to a point where you just feel numb? Like, you’re going through so many emotions but you’re not emotional, so you just feel numb? Because that’s how I feel.

They say you go through multiple stages of grief before finding peace. However, they don’t say how much time it’ll take before you find peace. It could be six months, a year, two years, etc., but eventually you will find peace. You could only hope you find it before you die, not while you’re already dying. But some people do. What a sad way to find peace.

We all grieve differently. Grieving is normal. Losing someone you love isn’t easy. It’s normal to grieve over them. But everyone grieves differently. I’ve noticed I tend to grieve in quite a strange way. I tend to fully accept the loss at first, pushing my grieving aside, trying to get ahold of every detail from what happened to why it happened to what time it happened, and then it’ll hit me a month or two later. I start going through the stages, then I’ll get busy and I’ll forget I was even grieving until another month or two later. This happens every few months. I don’t ever fully grieve. I start and then I stop and have to start all over again. Probably not healthy, but that’s just how I process things. Maybe I’m just used to losing people and that’s why I have such a hard time processing grief and releasing it, which probably sounds terrible, but it’s true.